I remember way back in highschool we were trying to choose who amongst us would be best to portray the female lead in our school play (Three Rats). And the teacher, infact she was my favorite English teacher, told the group that she thinks that it would be great if the female lead role was given to me. I was shocked sshe said that and was really flattered but when I heard the reason why she chose me I was taken aback.
"I think VJ would be a good choice. She fits the characteristics of the female lead very well, '...long hair, petite and beautiful...' And she can act like a good wife but do cynical stuff behind his back but still look innocent. Kaya nya humarap sa husband nya like a good wife but when she's in front of the other man she's a totally different person."
I really don't know if that was intended to be a comliment or an insult. My friends think that it was a compliment though, they said it just means that my teacher thinks I'm a good actress. But to me it felt like she was saying that I was a two face lying bitch and I am not like that. but that was when I was still in highschool.
GIST: THREE RATS (sorry I forgot the character's names)
This play consists of 3 characters only - the husband, the wife and the husband's best friend. The wife was cheating on his husband with her husband's best friend. The story revolves on how the wife was planning to kill her husband by putting in cyanide in his coffee. What she didn't know was that his husband already knows about the affair and is planning to kill his best friend. It's a story of betrayal that leads to murder.
Fast forward to now, at my young age, I've been cheated on, the reason why someone cheated and have cheated on someone. It wasn't something I should be proud of and believe me I was raised by good parents but sometimes when temptation comes in, you just can't say no.
Cheating is really not something new, in fact a lot of people are doing it they're just that good at hiding it that's why we're not even aware that they are doing it. It takes a great deal of talent in acting and lying to still look innocent while doing something wrong behind a person's back.
I cheated on my boyfriend of two years with a guy friend. This guy and I had gotten pretty close and well, when push comes to shove the friendship took a step up and has gone into a much deeper level. There really isn't any available excuse for what i did but I did it because with him I felt something, a connection that I haven't felt or seen with my boyfriend. He gave me this certain kind of confidence that my boyfriend never did. I was suddenly putting on some make-up, fixing up my hair and dressing up more than usual. I was trying to get my friend's attention and also that of my boyfriend.
Everything else came after that, we started seeing each other (in secret) more often than before and well, one thing lead to another we started craving for each other even more. I don't know maybe it was that thrill of being caught, the excitement of seeing each other without other people knowing was the reason why we cannot put the "relationship" to a halt. And honestly we tried to stop it, but it seems that our blood was boiling and begging for each others company.
The past two years was really a walk on the wild side but it wasn't a path I would like to cross again. I have lost a lot more than I gained with that decision of giving into temptation. My heart got broken and caused a great deal of pain not only to myself but also to others. I guess the only thing I gained from that was that i got stronger, I fell face down on the floor but I got back up, dust myself off and learned from what had taken place. It's a shameful act really. If I knew then what I know now I wouldn't have done it but then again if I didn't then I wouldn't be writing anything about it now and I wouldn't be as strong and willful woman that I am now.
No comments:
Post a Comment