Wild Child

Walking on the wild side is indeed fun; the excitement it brings is just indescribable. Not saying that I am a wild child, but I had my moments. Whenever I say something out of the ordinary when it comes to sex or anything within that range of topic, the way people react is just something I still can’t get used to. I just don’t know why I get those kinds of reaction when in fact what I just told them are facts not something I just made up with my dirty mind.

I’m not someone who keeps it all to herself or a woman that acts so naïve with what is going on, I say what I think and I say the truth. Like when someone asks me, “Are you a virgin?” I shamelessly say “No.” It’s not so wrong nowadays, especially with our generation.  But  I still consider myself lucky because I lost my virginity to someone I love and who really loves me, not just someone I met in a bar and did it while intoxicated with alcohol or drugs. I can honestly say that at that time we were ‘making love’ and not just having sex.

When you ask me something, I honestly answer your question, if I don’t want to (yes, I still keep a bit of privacy) I just slyly smile and say, “No comment” or for more dramatic purposes I just smile and walk away. Pero hindi ako yung tipong nasa loob  ang kulo, with me what you see is what you get. Maybe I just don’t look like how I really am. Some say I look innocent, well bless them for thinking like that.  

I remember reading something, I believe it was a tweet saying, “Sagittarius people don’t try to be seductive, they just are.” And I agree, some say it’s an asset, sex appeal? An asset? I think not because most of the time I think it’s a curse. (Most) men see me as someone worth fucking instead of someone to love or taken care of and that hurts you know? Sometimes I feel like there’s this piece of paper taped behind me saying “Fuck me” or “Have sex with me” or a big sign on my forehead saying “SEX” because it seems like most guys that I meet only want to get in my pants. It’s annoying really.

I’m so fed up of guys treating me as such, I’m just so lucky I still have my guy friends who treats me well besides the fact that they know my past and whatnots and of course I do have my ever so loving father who still thinks I’m his little empress and my overly annoying brother who (shockingly) gets pissed whenever he sees a guy looking at me (and/or my sister) in a malicious kind of way. These guys help me sane and still have faith that there are still good ones out there. I may just be a jerk magnet but there’s still someone out there for me and what the dubbed as “The lucky One” (if he gets to keep me for life).

As for me, I think I’ve seen enough of the wild side; I just want to take a break from all that mess and bullshits. I will take an oath to be a wild child no more (for now).